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Well, I've figured out that the laravel/serializable-closure doesn't support the tinker REPL: https://github.com/laravel/serializable-closure

I think that pretty much concludes this adventure. I'm not sure if the Bus::batch(...)->then(...)->dispatch() should throw a warning or exception when in the tinker REPL...

Big thank you to @macropay-solutions for helping talk through the issue! 👏

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@macropay-solutions
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@josephkerkhof
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@macropay-solutions
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@marius-ciclistu
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Answer selected by josephkerkhof
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